Tu B’Av, which has been called the Jewish day of love, is a most unusual Jewish holiday. Following exactly one week after the somber Tisha B’Av, which acknowledges the destruction of the Jewish temple, Tu B’Av holds an exalted place on the Jewish calendar.
Tu B'Av in the Talmud
The Talmud refers to Tu B’Av, which usually falls in late July, early August, as one of the two most joyful days of the Jewish year. While it may seem strange that exuberant joy should follow the mourning of one of the lowest points in Jewish history, the rabbinical scholars say that Tu B’Av fulfills much more than a secular Valentine’s Day, and in fact carries several significant messages for observant Jews.
First mentioned by Rabban Shimon ben Gamliel in the Taanit, it was considered a festive day in which the restrictions on men and women associating were lifted and young people were given to thinking about love, and the hopefulness of life.
"There were no better days for the people of Israel than the Fifteenth of Av and Yom Kippur, since on these days the daughters of Israel go out dressed in white and dance in the vineyards,” explains the Mishnah. “What were they saying? Young men, look up and consider whom you will choose (for your wife)."
The Mishnah also explains that this was a time when all of the women would dress the same by borrowing white dresses from each other so as to not appear distinctive and not bring shame upon those who were poorer and could not afford the finery of the others.
“The girls would all wear the same white simple dress so that rich girl, and poor girl ,would all look alike, none adorned with jewelry or make up, so that the males would get to know them for their intelligence and chesed, and not for their external attributes,” explains Rabbi Arthur Waskow in his explanation of Tu B'Av on the website TheShalomCenter.org.
A Jewish Holiday of Romance
Interpretations of the Mishnah vary from translation to translation, but the overriding theme of joyousness and optimism of the day has carried through to today. Through the years, Tu B’Av became a symbol not only for romance, but for hope. Interestingly, this sentiment is promoted by the fact that there have been a number of profoundly positive events that have taken place on the 15 of Av that has affected the Jewish people to today.
Often noted is the fact that the deaths of the generation that fled Egypt concluded on this date; that the Jewish people were reunited when the Tribe of Benjamin was permitted to reenter the community on the 15 of Av; that on this day the prohibition of different tribes intermarrying was dropped, and women were permitted to marry whomever they wished. History also notes that it was on the 15 of Av that the Romans finally permitted the survivors of the Bar Kochba revolt to bury their dead.
Following the destruction of the Temple, the custom of celebrating Tu B’Av fell out of practice. However, it has remained on the Jewish calendar as a minor holiday, and in fact, is still acknowledged in the synagogue. Jews do not say certain prayers on this date in recognition of its celebratory status.
Tu B'Av in the Jewish Calendar
Tu B’Av has also become a popular date for weddings, both in Israel and in Western countries. In Orthodox congregations, where it is common for the bride and groom to fast before their wedding, the mitzvah of fasting is dropped if the wedding is on the 15th of Av.
In recent years, Tu B’Av has gained significance in Israel as a day to celebrate love. Dances and celebrations are commonly held on this date. People give flowers, gifts and cards to loved ones, much as is now done in North America on the secular holiday of Valentine’s Day.
Tu B'Av and Community Connections
Jewish congregations and groups have also seen the returning popularity of Tu B’Av as an opportunity to encourage Jews to date and marry within their own communities, and an increasing number of Jewish centers and Jewish congregations have begun promoting social events on this date to bring young Jewish singles together.
Not surprisingly, this opportunity has not been lost on Jewish dating websites and organizations either, which provide their own services on that day to bring Jewish singles together for dating and romance. Tu B’Av, for all of its nebulous beginnings, continues today as a popular Jewish symbol of love and community connections.
Sources:
MyJewishLearning.com
TheShalomCenter.org
JStandard.com
WUJS.org.il
VirtuaJjerusalem.com
Search.com/reference/Tu_B'Av
Jan Lee - Jan Lee has been writing for online and print publications for more than 20 years and have been published in five countries.
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